Baby Vocabulary

Things change when you have a baby, including your vocabulary. Words that used to have one meaning when you're a student, or single, or childless suddenly take on whole new meanings...

"nipple" is a bottle part, not a body part
"crib sheet" refers to bedding, not a way to cheat on a test
"naptime" no longer refers to your OWN nap
"bouncer" is not the guy at the entrance of a bar, but a baby-holding contraption
"mobile" refers to the dangling toys, not your cell phone
"glider" is not an unpowered aircraft, but a human-powered chair
"wipe" is a noun, not a verb
"einstein" is used only with "baby" in front of it, not with "albert"
"rocker" is not a rock musician, but something to help put the baby to sleep
"monitor" no longer refers only to your computer screen but to the device transmitting your baby's cries
"bootie" is spelled "bootie" instead of "booty"
"pump" is not for pumping iron but rather pumping breasts
"changing room" becomes "changing table"--from trying on clothes in a mall to changing dirty diapers
"burp" is something to be cheered for, not sneered after
"formula" is not a mathematical equation, but a stinky milky liquid

There are also products for everything a baby can do:
sleepers
walkers
rockers
creepers
strollers
carriers
bouncers
sitters
hmmm...how come there are no droolers and screechers and babblers?

Anyway, just some random thoughts on parenthood by a linguist...